What is a “gutter-list” you may ask? Well it’s a bucket list, of sorts, only it’s down and dirty and represents all of our naughty desires. My gutter-list is a list of things that are going to make my money go right up my ass, sometimes literally! The following represents the toys Lilly and I most want to become “familiar” with over the next year. The list starts with the most “standard” sex toy, and ends with the most unusual. Shall we begin?
LELO: Ina Wave
Smile and wave.
This is a freebie for Lilly. I’m not sure how this will work for those of the male-bodied persuasion, but it’s plain to see this toy was designed specifically for the vagina owners out there. Despite having a ton of toys on our shelf, we have nothing that moves, or gyrates. so this will be a welcome first for us if we manage to get our hands on it!
Orgasmatronics: X1 Orgasmatron
It comes with a hat!
We were blown away by the Ambrosia vibe. We like what we have been seeing from Orgasmatronics so we though we would give their flag-ship product a go. Admittedly when Lilly and I first laid eyes on this toy, we weren’t quite sure how it was supposed to be used. Upon further inspection we believe it’s meant to be sort of a high-powered Hitachi wand. Delivering devastating vibrations to the user. We would love to give this one a shot!
We-vibe 4 Plus
Best mobile game ever. Everyone wins.
If you are not familiar with We-vibe, they have cornered the market on the “Couples-Vibrator”. The unique shape of their line of couples toys allows both a male and female to experience vibrating sensations during intercourse. Lilly and I love our We-vibe 2, and it’s time to upgrade. The We-vibe 4 offers many improvements, not the least of which is a mobile app that allows you to torture your loved one remotely. Oh the fun to be had!
Fetish Zone: “Pegasus V2” Equine Sheath
It’s nice to be hung like a horse.
Fetish zone has really raised the bar lately with the release of their new and improved V2 wearable line. These are loved and coveted by many a anthro-fan and kinky pet-players since it can help them both look and feel the part. I have very much enjoyed the Pegasus V1 when exploring my pony-persona, Sebastian, but the improvements with the V2 look both stunning and more comfortable. Giddy-up!
Bad Dragon: Anthro Shark
We’re gonna need a bigger budget.
Penetrable toys have been a more recent edition to the more “alternative” sex toy shops such as Bad-Dragon. After all, why should vagina-lovers be limited to simple human shaped toys like the flesh-light, while our fellow penis-lovers get to enjoy a wide variety of randy beasts? The labia on the shark actually resembles a human labia more so than their other female offerings. However it’s the fins on this toy that make it an exciting fantasy toy. Hopefully sometime before 2016 I will be able to explore “Under the sea”.
Primal Hardwere: Petunia
They’re under the ground!
So uh, yeah. I can’t quite explain this one. It’s just one of those weird feelings where your brain goes “Huh?” and your pants go “That’s my Fetish“. I can’t ever recall being turned on while watching Tremors, but the design of this penetrable from Primal Hardwere just seems to touch me in all the wrong places!
So there you have it, a whole year in front of us to get our freak on with a bunch of exciting in-animate objects! Do you have any other suggestions for toys you’d like to see us violate? Let us know in the comments or on Twitter.