Fun Factory Bi Stronic Fusion Thruster: C’mon Ride the Train!

How I Imagine it Went Down Somewhere in Germany an engineer was taking a long scenic walk in the German countryside. Suddenly, from a tunnel barely visible in a nearby hill, many tons of fast moving metal materialized and zoomed across the landscape. The engineer admired the Transrapid bullet train as it passed, their mind […]

Doxy Skittle

The Doxy Skittle: Keep Calm and Vibe On!

Putting ‘Skittles’ in your butt is generally a bad idea but for Doxy we will make an exception. Oh? Skittle is just the name that this cunning British sex toy company came up with for their new massager? Well then, Keep calm and vibe on! Meet the ‘Nobble’ As a P.O.E I thought my uses for […]

Bumble Bee holds a Frisky Beast Input Valve

More Than Meets The Eye: The Input Valve From Frisky Beast

When I was young I coveted a Transformer toy more than just about anything. As luck would have it my family wasn’t very affluent. I had grown up having to make such concessions as Mega Blocks instead of Lego, Turbo Wheels instead of Hot Wheels, and of course Go-Bots instead of Transformers. Once, while spending the night at my uncle’s house, I […]

Orgasmatron X2

The Orgasmatron X2 Sex Machine: Gyration Is the New Vibration

You know what is ridiculously expensive? Sex machines. I remember coveting a Sybian so bad that I had elaborate plans to build my own. As it turns out I suck at making things, but you know who doesn’t suck at making things? A little company called Orgasmatronics. One of Orgasmatronics sexy creations is the Orgasmatron. […]

Adventures In Business Travel: ‘Easy Beat’ TENGA Egg Pack

Max’s Log: Day 0 Location: Denver, CO You have got to be kidding me!? 2 separate business trips nearly back to back? Ugh, I have to dress up and pretend to be a normal productive member of society, gross! What about evening entertainment? Most of my sex toys are not things I’d like TSA to come […]

Primal Hardwere Krubera Ovipositor: For Science!

I drew in an anticipatory breath and cautiously let it escape my lungs. I thought to myself “This is your moment Max, you have been training for this” My thoughts then shifted to my thousands hundreds tens of readers. This was for them and I was going to see this through for each and every one of […]

Why “Wolfie-Style” Is Our Favorite Position: The Fetish Zone Cadejo

Werewolf painting in cover photo by Lexi Trust me, if you really want to turn her on? You gotta try werewolf sex! –The Upright Citizens Brigade What is with all the love for the undead? It seems everywhere I turn there’s another vampire romance or zombie sex toy. Zombies… really? I mean what could possibly be less attractive […]

Ovo B4 Cock Ring

A Stimulating Pleasure Structure: The Ovo B4 Cock Ring

About Betty’s Toy Box Canadians have all the luck! Moose, beavers, dollar coins (when will we be free of the dreaded paper dollar?)! One area Canadians seem to lose out on, however, is decent sex toy retailers. That’s where companies like Betty’s Toy Box come in. Based in Toronto, Ontario, Betty’s Toy Box is a sex toy retailer that […]

Pizzicato Your Clit With Class: The Lovehoney Clit Clamp

(To the tune of If You’re Happy and you know it) If you like pressure on your clit try a clamp! If you like pressure on your clit Try a clamp! You can put it on your clit or even on a tit if you like pressure on your clit try a clamp! Whats better […]

You Should Have Put a Tantus Vibrating C-Ring On It

“Cause if you liked it then you should have put a ring on it If you liked it then you should’ve put a ring on it Don’t be mad once you see that he want it If you liked it then you should’ve put a ring on it” Put A Ring on Your Thing-a-ling For […]